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led astray

January 2013

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led astray

reaching out

There are people I want to reach out to. People I want to know better and share understanding with. Connect with. But I have fear. I fear that ideas about things no human can comprehend in one lifetime would get in the way. I fear taking the leap to a different headspace. I fear that the connection would isolate me from other people that I love. I am afraid my intentions will be misread. I am afraid that they will fear me. But something draws me. Intrigues me. Pulls me towards them. If I seem cryptic, it's because I don't understand what I am thinking fully enough to communicate it. Either that or words are not sufficient. "Friend" they call me. But that says little. But it could say a lot.


Sometimes, words get in the way of ideas

It sounds like you're struggling with some of the same fears that have taken up permanent residence with me. I can tell myself "be bold" all I want... but they still don't go away.

I know that "go for it anyway" is an easy comment for someone else to make - and how little weight it can carry when everything is considered. If there's anything I can do - even just be a sympathetic ear - let me know.

Re: Sometimes, words get in the way of ideas

I'm not even sure what it is I hope to accomplish. I just like to know people. Some people are fascinating. I want to be everywhere all at once sometimes, and other times I want to dissapear.
Fear is what keeps me from getting to know most of the people at NERO. Hell, most people in life in general. When I'm in my safe zone, I'm a warm, affectionate, person with a zany sense of humor. To let that out though, I have to be comfortable, and it takes so much for me to find that comfort with folks.