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led astray

January 2013

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led astray

whining


Today is Friday.  I didn't used to work on Fridays.  I liked the free time, but I need more money.  I got offered Fridays and immediately accepted.  Annnd fast forward a couple weeks to LARP season.  Fuck.  That means sometimes having to leave early.  Oh, it's also my regular therapy day.  He doesn't work Thursdays.  So I bumpped up my appointment time to 9, which gets me to work an hour late.  Add to that the first day it might hit 70 this year and not being fully prepared for Legends this weekend, and I seriously do not want to go in to work today.  And my job isn't stressful.  Friday is even less stressful that other days because it's casual day and I sit way away from authority figures that day.  I think it's mostly the commute.  It's a good half hour shorter than my ride to school somehow.  But it's still an hour each way.  Last night I barely fended off a panic attack when Scarn took me to Target.  That hasn't happened in a couple months and I do not like going back to that headspace.  I haven't been sleeping well and I went cold turkey off my energy multi-vitamin.  Brilliant idea, huh?  Go juice in your vitamins.  It's great...until you run out and discover how dependant you are on that extra caffeine in the morning to do Anything.  I am bigger around than I have ever been before.  I don't obsess about it, but it does bother me, especially when I discover clothes that used to be too big are now to small and I get rid of them.  I used to have a work ethic.  Where did it go?
 

Comments

*hugs* Our brains go up and down, even when things are going well.

Have you tried yerbamate or one of those foofy energy tea ideas? They might give you the boost without the intensity and addiction of the caffeine.
ArooOOOOoooOOOooooo