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led astray

January 2013

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with a quickness


I was not mentally prepared to start working Fridays this Friday.  I'm letting it settle in my noggin.  I didn't get my bath because after lunch, annabelle and I spent more time than we thought shopping and being girly.  But that was fun too.  There will be dancing tonight and I'm knitting something that WILL be finished in time (because I'm triple-stranding to knit on 13's and be done with it, muahahahaha).  I'm happy with how it' turning out.  Pics later.  Not entirely sure how I'm getting there/back in the outfit I have put together.  Ought to be interesting.

Yesterday I was kind of fragile and I'm not sure why.  It got me a couple times during the day, but didn't keep me down all day.  It scared me though.  I keep thinking that not being depressed means not having to feel sad anymore, but that's not the way it works.  You can't actually pre-pay into your sadness quota.  I'll still have sad times and bad feelings, they just won't control my entire existance.  I get to have happy times along with sad times now.  And having sadness isn't the sickness I'm recovering from.  Sadness is in the normal range of human experience.  Not being able to be happy is the sickness.  Just because I get sad doesn't mean i'm sinking again.  But damn, does it scare me to think I might feel like that again.

Anyway, next week's free time is dedicated (with the exception of Nerd Night) to working on my play, which has fallen to the side of my adventure-seeking.  Er, and cleaning my room.  Dear gods, I don't know how I manage to get it to explode itself like that!  lol

 

Comments

*HUGS* Yeah, the sad times still suck. But I find usually a cry or a nap or a kitty-snuggle helps and then they pass, usually not more than a few hours, but the occasional day or two if something particularly sad is going on. But you're right sad is normal even if it's not fun. It's depression that is the illness. *hugs*

Glad you're having all sorts of fun things to explore though.
Exactly - we'll still feel sadness; that's completely normal. It's the lack of ability to feel happiness, or feeling nothing but sadness for extended periods of time which is the sickness. Coming out from under depression is going from having bad days with the occasional neutral or good day, to having neutral or good days with the occasional bad day.