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led astray

January 2013

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doll

the cut doesn't want to be cut today

 Oh, my goodness.  I have a severe case of the tireds.  Limbs are like putty, head is like iron.  I can't believe how long I am supposed to be here today.  I don't know how I'm going to make it.  2 cups of tea and my wake-up pill are not helping.  I have been getting enough sleep, I think.  Guh.  wtf.  I need a portable cot.

I like yarn.  I really need to get a better handle on how to size things.  I should take the time to knit sample swatches.  I know.  Stupid instant gratification urge.  Write things down.  Count stitches.  These things are important.

Wake up.  C'mon.  There are interesting and important things to do today and you won't get any benefit if you keep dragging ass like this.  No one wants to see you slumped over and barely awake when they are presenting vital information for your benefit.  The voice-over guy is in today.  You have to be up and alert and even friendly for that.  It's already after 10am.  But I want to be here, damnit.  I want to hear what this man has to say and meet him and network and all that stuff that's important to my livelyhood.  So get with it.  I am not above abusing my chemicals for the sake of my future.  We got step one (stay alive) and step two (get out of bed and out the door) going for us today.  The third step for today is to be PRESENT for this day.  Wake up!!  I will pump you full of more chemicals than you can shake a stick at.  Nervous and twitchy are better than floppy and groggy for today's business.  You can be as flacid as you want the next 2 days after today, I promise.  I need you to work with me today.  I have been looking forward to this day since the first day of class.  Nonono.  You cannot go back to sleep.  We're already here.  Isn't that the hard part??  Make it count.  Don't waste this day.  Fucker.  Please??  The weekend starts at 1pm tomorrow!  I need 11 more hours out of you today.  Ok.  I see you're playing hardball.  Well I'm not fucking missing this.  I have shit to do and I'm not going to let you get in my way.  You're a sick little bastard.  I can play the hardcore game just as well as you can.  You brought this on yourself.  I will not be your puppet.  You're nothing but a fist full of misfiring neurotransmitters.  You're a coward and you're lazy and with the help of my friends, I am going to kick your ass...As soon as I can stand.  So step 3, be present, becomes step 3, be present however I have to for now, and find better ways to be present when I'm stronger (a tactic blatantly stolen from sistahraven).

Comments

Your new icon is f'ing adorable :) I totally love it :)
You know what I find works good for pumping yourself full of chemicals, but it doesn't make you feel gross? (like soda)
Vitamin water :)
They totally have one called "Energy" and it gives you caffeine - in the water!!!
BRILLIANT! :)

Kick it's ass babe - I know you can do it :)
I second the recommendation of Vitamin Water. Their "revive" water used to get me through my 16-hour days at Angell. Yay for B-vitamins and Potassium.

That stuff in combo with their energy one? Booyah.
I tend to use coffee and chocolate. Like Rutger Haur in that one movie that no one has probably seen except me.

It sometimes bothers my stomach after five or so cups though...

You will attend "meet the voice over guy." And you will be attentive. I know this, because you really, really want to. And I don't know of much that stops you when you really, really want something.

Plus Hoyce has commanded it, so it's gotta happen.
You can make a very fancy blanket with your swatches. Or a scarf. Or a purse. Just make all your swatches, then sew them up all ragtag-like and make a pouch, and then make some i-cord for a purse. Or sew them together for a throw.... etc. etc.... :) It's good stuff!

I try to write stuff down when I knit projects..... it helps because I can't remember anything.