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led astray

January 2013

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amulet

lead me not

 Let me start by saying that you're pathetic.  Your head games may have been intriguing when I was 19, but I've done some growing up and I recognize what you're doing.  It's called passive aggression.  You activate and disable your facebook account based on your mood.  I posted that I had a good date and you disappeared.  Again.  Now, a couple weeks later, things are going shittier than usual for you and you want some sympathy.  But you don't want to ask for it.  That might mean you're not an island of badass lone wolfdom.  Instead you reactivate your fb and post 5-10 times a day how sad or lonely or cold or whatever you are.  You post song lyrics that may or may not be directed at me, but with your whole 10 contacts, I think the chances are I'm right.  "All I want is to hear her voice.  But does she want to hear mine?"  You posted it and I read it, but I'm done reaching out to you.  You want to hear my voice?  Fucking call me.  You want to be my friend?  Fucking call me.  I have tried to be your friend.  I defended you against the common sense criticisms of my friends.  I believed there was some good in you.  There may yet be.  You leave when I want you around and show up when I've stopped thinking about you.  I don't believe anything you say.  So when you sit on gchat waiting for me to initiate contact because i'm a sucker for a hard case, it annoys me.  And later when you finally give in and contact me, I'll have to hear about how I left you hanging, and that will piss me off and you won't understand why and cast yourself as a victim of my cruelty.  But you are the cruel one.  I don't trust you.  You have been emotionally abusive for as long as I've known you and your manipulative games are beyond stale.  I care about you, but I'm not going to play along anymore.  If you have something to say to me, I'm not going to go digging for it.  You'll say it or you won't.  And I will be fine either way.  Your confessions aren't even cathartic anymore.  You know where to find me.  So when you're ready to have a chat like fucking adults, I'll be here.  I'm not guessing your intentions anymore.  Act like my friend and not like my douchebag ex and maybe we'll have something to talk about.  

Comments

Word.
Sounds like you've got this one handled :)
*standing ovation*