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led astray

January 2013

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this is only a test

Yesterday it was suggested that the Star Wars crew go to dinner and to see Toy Story 3 after work tonight.  Except for Hoyce, who's Larping this weekend, everyone is in.  I was also invited, despite not being in the current game.  That is reassuring to me.  It looks like a gesture of inclusion.  I'm really glad that a break-up doesn't have to mean anyone loses friends.  There are no politics about this.  My friends are where I spent most of my good karma.  I don't know how you put up with me sometimes!  hehe  Landlord came by and we walked around the yard so she could show me where to plant and her plans for the space.  They are less than ambitious.  But I've been watching Garden Story (omg, it's gorgeous but watch it on mute for real!!) and I'm feeling inspired.  But I have to be careful to to throw my focus with to many projects.  Maybe next year I can redesign the space.  Just tomatoes and the Tori vine.  I have enough other shit going on.  This is discipline.  This is how we focus.  Patience.  The yard will be there next year.  I want some land of my own.  I think that would make me feel secure, to have something I can always go back to.  Having my own room could and should be like that.  Little by little I'm getting my space in a livable condition.  This space could be my sanctuary, rather than the place I sleep and keep my clothes.  Anyway, I wound up telling my woes to my landlord, who gave me a hug and is going to send me information about nature spots I don't need a car to get to.  :-)  Even one to go swimming!  So I am going into today with warmth and light provided by the kindness of the souls around me.  

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