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led astray

January 2013

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animeface

active meditation, to go through live actively and yet do nothing

Oh, the waiting game.  My crazy got loose this week and I acted out.  I saw myself doing it, knew it was wrong, and did it anyway.  For what reason?  Reason and emotion don't play on the same field.  I got called on it, but I don't think any lasting harm was done.  Remember to respect other people's boundaries.  Check.  All I have to do now is nothing.  Simple, right?  Simple, but not easy.  Ever see someone cooking rice and just can't leave it alone, then wonder why it never comes out right?  That's me.  So I'm going to leave the kitchen.  Hoyce and I are going to play CoC today, elsewhere.  Tomorrow, Hoyce is taking me to get new glasses, as mine are officially out of commission.  I have no idea if I'm getting hired yet.  Again, bread in the oven won't cook properly if you keep opening the door to see how it's doing.  So I have rice simmering and bread baking and am so grateful for my friends and family for providing me with distraction today.  I made a Clerk with a dangerous curiosity streak for today's game.  I should roll a back-up.  Perhaps a relative.

Comments

My trick for not stewing while waiting? Alternating between distraction and meditation.
My approach was less evolved. I self medicated. Things continued to go wrong. It has been a trial.